This film is not
slow paced. It's static. There is no pace. Nothing happens. Mostly
it's bad actors standing around mouthing embarrassing dialog.
There's this Asian
woman astronaut on an alien planet's surface. She's stalked by an
alien, which looks monstrous. But then they fight, and she kicks its
ass, bare-handed, before finally shooting it.
Hey, if a lady astronaut
can beat up an alien, with her bare hands, then that alien isn't so
scary.
That's the most
exciting event in this film's first 50 minutes. I stopped watching
after 50 minutes, because so far nothing had happened. Just lots of
talk.
There were also
these two astronauts, a guy and a girl, walking around the on the planet's
surface. The guy overacts to the point of hysteria. The girl tries to
act tough. At one point, rocks collect by themselves into giant balls,
and float around. The girl smiles and playfully pokes at one of the
floating rocks.
Why the floating
rocks?
She explains that
the planet is adapting to their presence and adds, "Nitrogen is being converted into oxygen."
Huh? You mean the
atmosphere is nitrogen? Then why are they not wearing
helmets? How is it that they breathe nitrogen?
Then an asteroid
crashes nearby, stirring up huge dust clouds, so the guy and the girl
have to run away.
Meanwhile, back on
the spaceship, some black woman chews out this Asian woman. I don't
know if it's the same Asian as was down on the planet and we're seeing
a flashback. She's wearing heavy "futuristic" facial makeup. The black
woman has a disease called Terminus. The Asian is immune. That's why
she was removed from her family at an early age, and trained to serve
The Order. She resents this.
The Order is the
group behind this space mission, which is apparently about finding a
cure for Terminus. We know all this because these two women talk a
lot. Actually, most scenes have long, boring dialogs between
people.
The black woman
threatens the Asian should she fail in her mission.
Later, the black
woman talks to a blond woman. Both women have sergeant stripes on
their arms, though they act like high ranking leaders. The blond woman
holds a glowing rock in her bare hands. She stares at it,
calling it a meteor fragment, and going on about how it is "data" that
has traveled "billions of years, millennia after millennia"
to bring its knowledge to us. (I think she's trying to channel
Carl Sagan.) The meteor might have been sent by aliens. The blonde
talks about history, and philosophers and zealots, all the while
staring at this glowing meteor fragment in her bare hands.
Meanwhile, these
two other astronauts, a black guy and a white woman, are ...
somewhere. Lots of machinery around them. Are they on the planet's
surface or in the spaceship? I think on the planet. And I think the
white woman was in a deadly fight with aliens. (Which we didn't get to
see.) These two astronauts talk a great deal about nothing much. Stuff
about their mission and such. The woman expresses alarm and fear. The
guy orders the woman to "do what you were trained for." He
threatens her. She assures him that she'll do her part of the mission.
Meanwhile, back on
the planet, the Asian woman is skulking around, avoiding aliens. She
has a flashback -- I think it's a flashback -- about how tough life
was back on Earth. I think that's what her flashback was about.
Meanwhile, the
other two astronauts have successfully escaped the huge dust clouds.
So now they're walking about. The man gets hysterical. Something about
the futility of their mission. The woman calls him a coward, and
orders him to do his job.
So that's the first
50 minutes of an 84 minute film. Just people walking around, talking
nonsense, getting mad or hysterical in a vain attempt to inject some
drama into the non-proceedings.
The alien and
spaceship CGI looks very 1990s. Very
New Outer Limits.
The spacesuits are
ridiculous. One reviewer mentioned the coconut breast plates on one of
the woman astronauts.
The sound is awful.
At first I thought one of the actors just wasn't speaking up. Then I
realized that many of the actors weren't speaking up. However, as it's
mostly junk science gobbledegook, you don't really need to hear it.
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